Reflecting on this it would seem that I have some ‘unfinished business’ (see I was paying attention). It’s no big deal, I have a tendency to avoid ‘endings’. And, sometimes, thinking about past ‘endings’, I get the feeling that somehow I’ve forgotten something.
I recently finished a spell as an interim HR Director. Recalling that session at Ashridge I re-read the chapter in Charlotte’s excellent Skills in Gestalt Counselling regarding endings, determined not to repeat past mistakes.
The key is to recognise the ending for what it is. Sloping off with no marking of the event diminishes it and agreeing that you’ll be back soon (when everyone knows you won’t be) denies it. Of course it may be appropriate to request or offer ongoing support and leave the door open for future relationships, but often this is simply a form of avoidance.
I decided that I’d make this ending ‘About Today’, not a raking over of the past or crystal ball gazing into the future. We’d just have a day that was my last and clearly mark it as such.
We had a small team lunch, shared a few stories – nothing too serious. Then we went back to work and I tidied up a few loose ends before leaving. Perhaps we’ll keep in touch and maybe I’ll be back. I’d like that. But if not we’ll all be fine.
And yes even though it was very low key I’m pretty sure I didn’t forget anything.